How do you tell if your son is gay
By guest blogger, Ian Taylor.
Help, I think my kid may be gay. What should I do? Am I right? Whereas I am no way homophobic, I don&#;t know how I will react if it&#;s true&#;
It is understandable that every parent has concerns or questions regarding whether their child maybe lesbian, gay, bisexual and/or transgender (LGBT), considering the world we live and today; and especially if the parent starts to see one or two signs.
In this article, we answer some of the most troubling questions you may have if you suspect that your minor may be gay or bisexual.
Are the suspicions starting to build?
If I think that my teen might be same-sex attracted, how should I discuss to them about it? They mentioned the subject several times, so I&#;m getting concerned.
Until your youngster comes and tells you that they are, or might be LGBT, you can’t know. Try not to make assumptions and let them come and tell you in their own time. Create a positive environment where your child feels able to talk to you about their sexual orientation and/or gender identity. For example, say positive things abo
Book Excerpt: Is Your Kid Gay?
Excerpted fromWhy Is the Penis Shaped Like That? … And Other Reflections on Being Human, by Jesse Bering, by arrangement with Scientific American/Farrar, Straus and Giroux, LLC (North America), Transworld Ltd (UK), Jorge Zahara Editora Ltda (Brazil). Copyright © by Jesse Bering.
We all recognize the stereotypes: an unusually light, delicate, effeminate wind in a little boy's step, an interest in dolls, makeup, princesses and dresses, and a powerful distaste for rough participate with other boys. In little girls, there is the outwardly boyish stance, perhaps a penchant for tools, a square-jawed readiness for physical tussles with boys, and an aversion to all the perfumed, delicate trappings of femininity.
These behavioral patterns are feared, loathed and often spoken of directly as harbingers of adult homosexuality. It is only relatively recently, however, that developmental scientists have conducted controlled studies to identify the earliest and most reliable signs of adult homosexuality. In looking carefully at the childhoods of gay adults,
Responding to Teen Youth Who Says He&#;s Gay
I’m devastated that my son thinks he&#;s gay. One minute I’m so angry I could scream — and the next I just sit and cry. We cherish our son, but we don’t wish the influence of same-sex attraction in our home (we have younger kids in the house).
ANSWER:
Before we say anything else, know that our hearts move out to you in the pain and confusion of hearing your teen son tell you that he&#;s lgbtq+. The emotions you’re experiencing are understandable reactions of a concerned and loving parent. You’re prudent to ask for input about how to handle things, and we&#;ll cover several thoughts here:
Respond calmly and respectfully
So, how should you respond to what your son told you? Respectfully and in as cool-headed and non-reactive a way possible.
But don&#;t panic if you and your son hold already had a blow-up with each other. Ask for forgiveness and the chance to open over. Agree with him that you’ll both do your best to remain away from hurtful attitudes and deeds going forward. As with all interpersonal interactions, you can only control yo
As I relayed in When Your Child Is Gay: What You Need To Know (Sterling, ), I found out that my son was gay from a note with our son's label entwined with another boy's, surrounded by a heart. I accidentally found that note in his room when I was cleaning.
I never questioned him about the heart I found on the sly. How would I include brought it up? Suppose I was wrong? After all, he had a crush on a girl in his class.
I had suspected at times that he was gay. He only had girls to his thirteenth birthday party. He preferred gentler sports. He was always concerned about how he looked and followed fashion. Were these stereotypical thoughts from a straight mother? You bet, but it was ingrained through the culture's binary system and ideas about how males were "supposed to" behave.
As it turns out, our son didn't come out until he was 17, was on his own, and brought a partner to visit. Had I asked him if he were lgbtq+ when he was 13, he probably would have defensively said "No!" He had to serve it out and work through his denial. I'm glad I muzzled myself.
Susan Berland, the mother o